It is less than 60 days from the most expensive holiday of the year. Brace yourself,  Christmas is coming. Santa is coming. Lists are being made. Shopping is being done. I am ahead of the game for once in my whole life. Well, as ahead of the game as I get when it comes to extra spending on anything on a teacher’s pay. Then,  it happens! Two days before Halloween, the hubs tells me about a nightmare. The dryer isn’t drying. The reason the hubs is the one that tells me of the nightmare on laundry room lane is that he is the master of the washer and the dryer around here. 

I try to come up with reasons like the vent pipe is kinked or loose. After some mountain of clutter climbing, we checked the hose for clogs, tears, and kinks. It has a hole. I use my super power- Amazon to purchase a new one. Problem solved. Nope. 

Oct. 31

One load of clothes takes 6 rounds in the dryer. I am still hopeful that the Amazon will save us. 

Nov. 1 AM

Hubs- Babe, the dryer is not heating. 

Me- I ordered a new hose. 

Hubs- That won’t help. 

Me- So the new dryer is getting a new hose. 

Hubs- Probably

Nov. 1 PM

I come home from work and check the clothes in the dryer. They are not dry. I begin a conversation with with the dryer. 

Me- What are you doing? It is not your turn. Dry Damn it!

Dryer- silence

Me- I said it is not your turn. Dry. 

Dryer- silence

Me- Hits dryer. 

Dryer- silence

Husband returns home. I say, so what are we going to do   about the dryer. 

Hubs- Pulls up Youtube video on how to replace a heating element. 

Me- I start looking for dryers online. 

Hubs- That guy lied. This is not simple. 

Me- So order one?

Hubs- That sounds like a plan. 

I walk down stairs and walk in the laundry room. 

Me- You are out of here, slacker. 

Dryer- Silently sits probably smirking. 

Me- I hope you end up recycled as a metal parts for a port a potty. 

Nov. 6

Dryer is heating. It heard the new dryer is on its way. It still takes 6 cycles to dry, but it did make an effort. It must be scared I will really have it recycled as a port a potty. 

Nov. 7- The slacker is out. The dryer and I broke up. I am in a relationship with a new dryer. No scrubs!